Request granted

I was reading my journal from 1986 today...the winter before I met Greg the following May. To say I was depressed is a major understatement. In fact, as I read it this morning, I could hardly relate to the girl who wrote it some 27 years ago.

There was such a loneliness in my life at that time. Being a single parent was not what I had planned for my life. In fact just a few years before, I had no plans of being a parent at all, let alone a single, divorced one. I felt blessed beyond belief to be a mother. On more than one occasion, I had made the observation that "in spite of my mistakes and failures, God has given me this precious baby boy." Still a part of my heart was broken and empty.

Within the pages of that journal, I read thoughts and prayers of the lonely 23 year old girl and found something that was absolutely overwhelming. One night, I had written a prayer, pleading with God to send someone that would love me. I had described in great detail exactly the kind of man I was asking Him to give and even explaining why (as if He didn't know my heart already ;). Because it was so personal, I hesitate to share the details, but to generalize a few:  "someone who will love me so much that I will never doubt it...someone who loves the Lord...someone I can feel free to share everything with and who will share everything with me freely...someone who will love my son and take care of us...someone whose eyes even show how much he loves me..." and the specific qualifications went on. What an order that would be to fill! I can't help but wonder if I truly believed God would answer.

25+ years later, I can say without any reservation that God answered that prayer. All of it! Our marriage has not been perfect and we have faced many obstacles, but through it all, Greg Jackson has never failed to be everything I had ever hoped for as a husband!  I don't think it was ever as clear to me as it was this morning as I read the prayer I so desperately laid before the Lord that night.

How many prayers have I prayed with the same desperation over the years? Being a mother of 3, many! Why could I ever doubt that God hears these prayers and will answer?I don't know, but I do. My prayer, like the man who brought his son to Jesus to be healed, is "I believe, Lord, help my unbelief." I give praise unto "Him, Who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us."